Day 43 : "Dissed by Chris Evans"

I woke up with a renewed energy this morning, looking forward to my first week in over a decade as a "thirteen stone something" man.  But I was brought back down to earth by Radio 2.

Driving to Southampton, I was listening to Chris Evans' Breakfast Show.  He was talking about weight loss and different ways to achieve quick results so, as I was stuck in traffic, I thought it might be apt to text him, not really thinking that I'd get a mention.

However, within a couple of minutes of hitting send, my recent achievement was broadcast to the nation.  Well, sort of.  In mis-paraphrasing my text, he totally missed the point, and poo-pooed my methods at the same time.

This was my slightly-full-of-myself text:

"Chris, I've eaten fish and salad and been to the gym every single day for the last six weeks, and dropped from 16 stone 7lb on 16th October to 13 stone 13lb as of yesterday! Simon, Swindon."

But utilising his questionable artistic license, this is what Chris Evans announced (if you're vaguely interested, you can hear it on Listen Again here http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio2/shows/chris-evans/ at 1:10:29 in today's show):

" 'Chris I've eaten fish and salad for the last six months, been to the gym every day, dropped 3 stone from 16 to 13, says Simon in Swindon.'  Si, yeah we know you can do it like that, <chuckling> we're just looking for other ways.  Yeah, we know fish and the gym on the daily menu would probably work, yeah, we are aware, thanks.  And well done by the way. We'll try and share in your thinness."

Six months!?  Of course that wouldn't necessarily be that impressive!  But I've done it in six weeks!! Affronted, I pulled over at the next opportunity, and sent him another text:

"6 weeks, Chris, not 6 months! Simon, Swindon"  I did put a smiley face on the end so as not to seem too aggressive.

But alas, by the time I got to Southampton 45 minutes later, there had been no public apology from the BBC.  Obviously, I'm not as important as Manuel from Fawlty Towers.  (Despite the fact that I was an extra in the made-for-TV film "A Wreath of Roses" in 1987.  My right ear was clearly visible in shot behind Fulton Mackay for a good 30 seconds.)

So Chris Evans is now OFF my Christmas Card list.  The ginger tosser.

My diet today has consisted of:

- Breakfast:  A banana;
- Lunch:  A tuna salad;
- Dinner:  A tin of tuna, a tin of mackerel, two pickled eggs and a few cherry tomatoes.

Gym:  Monday night chest and stomach workout, and 30 minutes on the cross trainer.

Down-with-the-kids Disclaimer:  In case any of my younger readers think I'm old and past it for listening to Radio 2:  I do listen to Scott Mills on Radio 1 on the way home.  And I don't mind a bit of Dubstep.  Innit.